I finally set my pride to the side to tackle the adjudication email that I have been avoiding way too long.
Preparing myself I set up a plan.
1) Read the notes at the library, giving me no chance for loud emotional outbreaks.
2) Read through the whole bit at once, not finding just the negative bits to dwell over.
3) Write down notes as I read to further dissect the comments.
4) Find the good comments as well as the bad.
5) Make a new plan of how to change the story so I can send it out again.
6) Reward myself with coffee and cake at the library cafe once I am finished.
I like a good plan, written out clearly, colour coded and ready for action.
Reaching point no. 2 I found what I hoped that there would be, some good points and some bad.
The good thing (once I stopped arguing with my computer that the reasons for clumsy sentences and structures has to do with me not being a native English speaker), it was not as bad as I first thought.
Bad thing, they pointed out silly mistakes I made (with clumsy sentences and structures) that I am now kicking myself for. Mistakes that partly has to do with my grasp of the English language, however if I took the time and let the story rest for a couple of days, I would have found and questioned most of them.
Note to self: Do not work down to the wire, it will not do you any favours.
Yes there are some big structural flaws with the story which I need to sort out. On the whole though, this has been a positive experience and opened my eyes which will hopefully lead me to become a better writer (see what I did there? Positive thinking. I can do this!).
Now I am going to sit down, write something clever, flawless and most of all a winner.